I Thought This Has To End

AND THE STORY BEGINS...

For about a month now, I thought of leaving this blog.

For about a month now, I thought of puting an end to my Blogspot blogging life.

For about a month now, I thought of moving from one blogging site to another.

BUT...

I realized I couldn't judt leave this site.

I realized I love this site a lot (and the people who take time to read my posts).

I realized leaving is not always the only option.

I realized I can never abandon something that has taken a huge part in my life's history.

SO NOW...

I am back on track.

I am now updating not just two blog sites, but three.

I am and will always be happy writing stuff, writing my thoughts, writing about anything that comes to mind.

JUST SO YOU KNOW...

This is actually one of the reasons why these thoughts came to mind, PAMELA'S SANCTUARY.


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I Thought So

I am my own self. I am not like anyone else. I am uniquely made.

I have my own mind, my own free will, my own brain that functions the way it was molded to function for me. I am disappointed. You know why? Because I thought you know me well. But sad to say, you don't.

Stop thinking the way you are thinking about me. I so hate this feeling. I hate being judged wrongly. Some may say that I should speak up, that I should explain myself. But why? Why do I have to do so when I know where I am perfectly standing.

I have nothing against you. I am just really disappointed with your actions. This will pass I know, but for now, allow me to have the distance I need. I need to think who my REAL friends are, or do I really have one?

I am trying not to feel affected with what you are showing me, but how the hell would I do that? I am sensitive. Just so you know. I am human. That's part of being who I am. 

I am hurt with your judgment. The hell. I am not the type who curses people, but please allow me to (for now).

What's Going On?

(A NOT so good post to start the year. :))

The holidays' over yet I still haven't done anything new that would most probably be a hint that a new year has come. These past few days, I was trying to write something. I wanted to post something since it's been awhile since I posted something worthwhile in here. But, I do not know what hit me or what I have eaten that it seems like words aren't coming.

Before the past year ended, I thought of writing a short assessment of what happened with my 2009. Surprisingly, I did not have the urge to realize that thought. I was too lazy to even turn on my laptop or our computer back home (I went back to province for New Year). I was too busy or should I say too preoccupied with a lot of stuff, not to mention with intrigues I would have wanted not to hear.

Anyway, so here I am again, trying to catch my words so it won't slip away and that I would have something to say, at least for now. Do I sound a little weird? Well, I find myself a little weird since I flew back in Manila. A lot of thoughts are coming to mind, which make me wonder sometimes. I guess I'm just a little bothered about what's going to happen this year. Worried in the sense that I do not have any concrete plan for this year. It's like I'm stuck with my present self that I am a scared of conquering another because it might hurt me big time or might struck me somehow, and that I am not ready for it. Wah! I honestly do not know what's going on here. It's so not me. I shouldn't be feeling this way. =(

Oh well. This has to stop. I need to be back on track. Bear with me for now. :)