Thursday, September 17, 2009

Silently Searching

As the sun silently set, comes with it are magnificent rays as if telling me that though it’ll bid goodbye for awhile, it still owes me another tomorrow. Just another day to find the true meaning of my existence.

I guess I am not alone in that sense. I guess there are a lot more people out there, who, just like me, are still in search of the reasons why they’re living. Perhaps this is the toughest challenge of being alive. The challenge of knowing why God placed us here – wherever we may be at now.

Months ago, I was having this dilemma, well actually even up to now. I was trying to figure out why I had to go through all these struggles. Months ago, I was trying to go a deeper soul searching. It wasn’t the emo type, I mean just like how soul searching means for celebrities. It was more of searching the essence of the life that He has given me.

Lately, there were a lot of thoughts running through my head. It was like a school of fish trying to find a place where it could settle down. These thoughts kept on bugging me. At first I was just ignoring them but as days gone by, I could not help but notice them. And so finally, I gave these thoughts a place in my head.

Apparently, one of those was the thought of realizing one of my distant dreams, to inspire other people through my own little way. Sad to say though, I was discouraged. Knowing that I only have a couple of friends, that would really be impossible. Yet God works in mysterious ways. Days ago, I came across a probable movement, a group of people who share the same vision as mine. I only have to send them an email, and wait for their reply. To be a little descriptive, it’s a group of youth who promotes the true essence of love.

Ops! It isn’t mushy. It’s not the one you might be thinking of. There’s more to that description. They’re actually promoting a Godly living. Oh well, so much for that. The catch here is actually this, silently I searched, silently the answers are one by one, coming my way.

Call me too idealistic. Call me an old school. Call me not “in”. Call me whatever you want to. I don’t really care anyway. I guess this is a good way to start my dream. A dream of becoming a good example not just in front of the people I know, but much more to those who I don’t really know.

As the sun set, I know it’ll rise again. And as it comes shining the next day, it as well means another day to fulfill what my existence is all about. It may not be that clear yet, I know, soon, everything’s going to be handed to me.

1 comment:

Random Student said...

Good for you, Pam. The noblest efforts nga are those that we do even if no one is looking. We do them naturally as part of who we are, our persona. This is why joyful people go about their normal days satisfied, almost smiling, having a good disposition about issues that come their way. Hopeful. It's entirely a different scene with a person complaining about everything. They seem to find things around them or in their lives to be not enough all the time. They are normal in behavior, giving out the best jokes or laughing at jokes they hear but that doesn't mean they are capable of joy. Laughter, yes. But everything else for them is always BS. Life is short. Hopelessness is addictive. On a daily basis, we always get the chance to be one or the other -- the joyful one or the one without it.