A Piece of Realization

Letting go is really hard not only in love but in other things as well.

Today, I realized that not being too attached with the people around me won't give me much of a heartbeak if they decide to go for further journey. I am saddened with the news that one of my colleagues is leaving. We may not be that close, the fact that he considers me as his little sister affects me somehow.

I encountered this dilemma during my two previous jobs. The only difference is, I was so affected then, and I was the one who left. I got so close with my batchmates that my heart bled when I left them (I resigned from my company). I realized from those experiences that leaving someone behind is painful (though I also believe that the feeling is mutual with being left behind). It crushed down my heart seeing them tormented with my decision.

But now, I was able to manage it well. For I have learned that I should be professional enough in handling my 'professional' relationships. I do not want to encounter the same predicament again.

I remember what a DJ once said, "Never get too attached with your workmates because no matter how you do not want to, they will always seek for better chances and will leave you behind." Yes indeed, that's why rom the time I heard those words, I promised myself that the next time I meet new bunch of professional friends, I won't be too attached so as not to cause myself any lamentations once they decide to go - and vice versa.


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Monday Escapade

I'm done reading my nth book authored by Paulo Coelho. To be exact, the book is entitled, 'Brida.' Though it took me a couple of weeks before I finally read the conclusion, it doesn't matter. The important thing is, I'm done.

I don't intend to do a book review here, so I'll start ranting my last night's escapade. And the story goes like this . . .

Since I wasn't able to go to mass last Sunday, I decided to just catch up on yesterday's seven o'clock mass at EDSA Shrine. It doesn' matter if the gospel wasn't the same as on a Sunday. What matters to me is, being able to go to mass. So right after the clock turned six o'clock, I hurried my self going to the biometric to log out.

I was struggling so hard to catch up the bus that was about to pass our building. Fortunately, I made it. Almost twenty minutes has passed aleady and I only have around forty minnutes before the mass starts. I got impatient aleady (since I was in a hurry nga). Manong driver couldn't drive faster than he should. He drove the bus as if it's running out of engine. Worst is, he followed the bus infront of him. It's as if our bus is being tagged along by the other bus.

My mood changed adversely, I was hopeless aleady. I know in myself that I won't be able to catch up the scheduled mass. More to that, Manong Driver also stopped for long in every bus stop station. It's as if everybody's going to ride on their bus. Though I understood well that like me, they're just doing thei jobs. But being too insensitive is what I'm ranting about.

But I cannot blame them, because maybe they thought their passengers are not in a hurry. They thought it's okay to wait up until their bus runs out of space for occupancy, and that nobody would argue with them about it. But I believe, if ever, that would be a lame excuse. After all, I guess they should also try to understand their passengers.

Now, you might think, "Ba't di ka nalang nagtaxi eh nagmamadai ka naman pala?" My reasoning goes like this, first, I can't afford a taxi ride (Uber sa kamahalan sumakay ng taxi kaya dun nalang sa mas mura). Second, I was expecting that there's no such incident (I did not anticipate that there would be traffic kasi it was Monday, at walang traffic pag Lunes). Lastly, it was tried and tested already (minsan na akog nakarating ng Ortigas na naabutan ko ang mass kaya ang way of thinking ko is paerho lang nung dati).

As expected (half-way), I didn't make it. I arrived during the communion. So my mass turned to praying silently while waiting for it to end. Wala akong choice but to just have a personal prayer time instead of attending the mass. But, sabi nga, there's always something good after every bad 'scene.' I learned na EDSA Shrine do have an Adoration Chapel (well, I hope I'm right...I still have to confirm it pa pala). At least now I know where to go during trying times wherein I always seek for silence or in other words, inner peace.

One more thing, I also learned that I do really have to control my being impatient. Though I did not argue with Manong driver nor did I make dabog or things like that, I know he saw my facial reaction. My face then was a perfect example of being irritated. Well, at the very least, I still managed to stay as calm as possible. I still manage to handle my irritation though it shows. At least, I was able to still visit the church (yun naman kasi ang importante).


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Change?: A Political View

If my recollection is right, it was during the past weekend when I first grasp the news regarding a movement being launched for Panlilio-Padaca's 2010 political career. According to news, the movement is eyeing the two individuals as running mates for the forthcoming elections. For what post? Presidency and vice-presidency.

When I heard about it, my initial reaction was, "Oh rEally?" I was thrilled about the thought. From there I saw how eager the Filipino people are for a renewal of Philippine politics. It feels good that there are people who are willing to excert effort just to have a rebirth in our political system. It's another thumbs up for the Filipino people.

But is this 'really' the right move? Is Panlilio and Padaca the 'answers' to the Filipinos' cry for political change? Are they capable of leading a country that is full and is surrounded by injustices, graft, and corruption? Do they have enough expertise and knowledge to rule a 'somewhat' dying country like ours? If the answer is yes, then be it.

Today, one of my colleague asked me about the latest news. She asked for my point of view regarding the issue. At first, I was hesitant simply because I haven't think about it yet. I haven't internalize the issue. If I were to give an opinion, that won't be as objective as it should be. But after awhile, I was able to come up with an answer. And that is, "I want to see their track record first as 'political leaders.'"

I've always wanted change, who doesn't? I've always believed that we are capable of it. And that as well, we deserve it. But how? Politically speaking, I think we, Filipinos are hopeless already. Hopeless of looking for the perfect leaders. I myself is counted. I am one of the many Filipinos who wish for the best. After all, nobody would want the best for thhis nation other than ourselves.

When I reached eighteen, excitement filled me because of the chance to choose my leader. A leader who I believe would be a good example to his constituents. A leader that would stand for the right. A leader who's willing to offer his blood and sweat for the sake of his mother nation. A leader worth voting for.

But, everything changed when I finally experienced the once in a blue moon chance. Why I said so? Because sometimes, circumstances won't allow you to do so. Who knows, right? Anyway, back on the 2007 elections, I saw the real world of politics. I saw how selfish other people could be just for the sake of having 'political power.' I am a living testament on how my precious vote vanished.

I grew up in a family that is active in politics, but fortunately, I grew up as an idealistic politician's daughter. But I won't give any further info about that. That's another story. Though I admit, that made and molded my views on Philippine politics.

Going back, it's obvious, the movement is seeking for nothing other than a political reform. They, like me, believe that we deserve something better than the 'usual.' They too believe that no one could initiate change but us. They too believe that there's still a chance for excellent, nationalistic leadership. There is, and fortunately, it's in our hands.

I have nothing against the two names being tagged as the future of the future. I have nothing bad to say against them. After all, I haven't seen how they were able to catch these people's attention. I haven't seen how they have initiated change in their own districts after their election. I haven't seen their passion in their leadership.

For me, everyone is capable of changing the political status of our country. I believe everyone can initiate change as long as the intention is pure. It doesn't matter if you're a priest or a disabled. What matters is, you are willing to offer nothing other than selflessness. After which, everything follows.

One more thing, change can't be done in just a fraction of a second or a snap of a finger or overnight. It's something to be done everyday. It also doesn't necessarily have to come from anyone, for it comes from within each one of us. We are the greatest tool for change. We, the Filipino people are the best machinery towards the advent of a better nation.

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